America, you can stop holding your breath waiting for President-elect Trump to face the failing media. It all happened on Wednesday. Like a true Hollywood big screen hero, Trump rode in and slayed the opposition.
Watch a couple highlights here. The full reel is entertaining, but far too long for the DWA 5th grade level Twitter followers the actual performance was aimed at.
Ten American Flags at Attention: Trump Press Conference (01/11/17)
Trump provided some good visuals, as always, Even lazy mainstream reporters noticed and commented on the unprecedented array of no less than 10 American Flags as the primary background. That stack of 500 manila folders ($15.99 per box of 100 1/3-cut letter size folders at Office Depot) stuffed with Xerox copies on the front table was a sparkling, attention-grabbing corker. The media yappers kept going for a slow camera pan & zoom to remind viewers, just how fraught they were.
Trump Cuddles Up with Personal Ethics Lawyer Who Explains It All To The Rest of Us
Trump finessed his ethics and conflict issues by introducing his hugely respected personal lawyer to remove any legal doubt about such silly stuff as the Constitution’s emoluments clause,* to assure doubters it is not a Trump problem, what with the Business Blind Trust (Modified) to be run by little Donnie Jr. and his younger brother, Eric.
To provide some levity as the press closer, there was a uniquely Trumpian finish. He looked square into the camera and gave everyone a chill by issuing the iconic TV phrase (beloved by generations), “You’re Fired”. Complete with a pointed finger, aimed at his own sons, if they do a bad job (such as lose money).
Trump Mock Fires His Two Sons for Bad Job in 8 Years
As a pleasant nostalgic reminder, here is a compilation of Trump mini clips from his glory days (lasting a decade) as the Boss on TV from 2004-2014
Trump “You’re Fired” Greatest Hits Compilation Video
Earlier during Playtime with the Press (January 11 Edition), the President-elect fielded a double barreled question asking if Trump thought Obama’s actions went too far on Russia, and what Trump’s response was to Sen. Lindsey Graham’s intention to introduce a tougher bill on Russian sanctions.
Trump Listens In to Obama-Graham Question: Start of Deflect & Ignore Routine
Here is a complete video of the whole scene that we can call the best Deflect & Ignore Sequence.
In these special moments we see an easy fluid demonstration of Trump’s communication genius. He dazzled for all to see the Presidential professional version of the “Deflect & Ignore” shield. This all-American version is an homage to the original Captain America superhero device** introduced in March 1941, five years before Trump was born.
Trump Dons the Graham Grimace: A Patent Pending Facial Move
Trump rapidly bagged the Obama front end of the question smartly with a rightward forearm swipe, and then beamed his magic powers on hapless Senator Lindsey Graham (R-SC) who had the temerity and terrible instincts to compete with Trump for the nomination, back before Trump was Trump the Triumphant.
Trump Demonstrates the Graham 1% Ceiling Jiggle Gesture
During the campaign, Trump ridiculed Graham with a 1% support quip. Semi-funny and amusing, if not consistent with Presidential type gravitas and character. On Wednesday, Trump’s ID flashed an emergency internal warning, and he rolled out a new “crack that 1% barrier one day” biting quip, complete with a nicely formed Trump smirk, head shake and mouth click triple combination.
Trump’s Captain America Shield: Deflect & Ignore Premium Edition
A Captain America Trump-style bravura display. A quick deflection, firm right foot plant pivot, and a lightening discus-like shield toss for the political decapitation of a sitting member of the Republican slender two-seat Senate majority. Revenge will out, and tastes just fie hot or cold. All America was cheering this powerful introduction to what is sure to be an important part of the Trump armamentarium for the next four years.
Before we conclude, we might just allow for a couple of niggling little facts to briefly pop up their heads. Facts are those inconvenient, pesky devils that seem to trail Trump in sadness virtually everywhere he goes on the mission to spread joy, prosperity and comfort to all deserving afflicted Americans.
South Carolina is a proud Son of the Old South State, with a strong military service and patriotic heritage, and is hard-core Red election territory. In 2016, Trump garnered 54.9% of the total vote in the state (1,155,389 votes). This was a clear majority victory, but it was fairly anemic compared to actual voting margins in other equally Red States.
South Carolina’s junior Republican Senator, Tim Scott, on the same day and in the same voting booths in November, got 60.5% of the S.C. vote (1,228,844 votes). Now that’s a proper Red State margin. So a junior Senator (who also happens to be a black guy) beat Trump by 75,000 total votes or 6.5% in this deep south Republican enclave. We also can’t forget that Trump was running against just a woman, either, who should have been a very soft target here.
For the record, when Lindsey Graham (R-S.C.), the state’s Senior Senator, last ran for re-election before the good folks of South Carolina two years ago in 2014, the Wanna-Be Barrier Cracker received 55.3% of the General Election vote, thus actually beating Trump’s 2016 performance.
Trump’s rhetorical jab at Graham was skillfully delivered. It does, however, still leave us with a factual question of just what barrier Trump meant to call forth while jibbing Graham. South Carolinians must have something of a mixed picture of Trump’s prowess or he would have been more successful there in the election. One might wonder why Trump was relatively weak in S.C. where he should have been mega-strong.
From America’s point of view, a day later, the larger issue is that we still don’t have a direct, honest answer from Trump about Russian election spying, independent of all his whining and others’ noise about salacious sexual peccadillos aimed at Trump that some have tossed around on the very same Wild West internet that Trump himself likes to frequent to troll for Twitter bait.
Others have pointed out the conflation syndrome confusing of equating BuzzFeed to CNN, and mixing them together. Trump’s Deflect & Ignore maneuver on the newsworthy question of Obama’s Russian Sanctions is a Trump initiated redux example of conflating a serious policy matter with an unworthy personal political jibe, punting on one and joking about the other.
To be continued.
In the meantime, look for more flashy, purely Presidential displays of the updated Captain America by Trump brand Defect & Ignore Shield.
Commercial Possibilities for Trump’s Slogan to Deflect & Ignore
Naturally, Trump has updated the style and materials used in the flawless construction of the Trump Captain America shield design and slogan to reflect his new found power, as well as his prior fabulous wealth and vaunted irresistible catnip appeal to the ladies.
Trump’s Captain America Shield: Deflect & Ignore Standard Edition
In concert with Trump’s aggressive approach of priming the pump, it soon occurred to the Team that, just as with the MAGA hat opportunity and tradition, there was an opening to connect solidly with Trump’s army of Presidential admirers. Therefore, coming soon will be a high-quality line of consumer keepsakes, including miniature desk replicas, key chains, and luxury personal jewelry items.
Prototype of Captain America by Trump Desk Ornament Miniature Keepsake
Ivanka will apply her design and marketing skills to aid this patriotic effort. The Team will offer select premium versions of only the most significant keepsakes, under Donald J. Trump’s personal direction. Use of cast bronze genuine Trump autograph accents and the tasteful, judicious incorporation of real gemstones where appropriate, are being seriously considered.
First Edition Captain America by Trump Keychain & Security Buzzer
Americans can rest assured that all the items offered will be strictly licensed and quality controlled, made using only the best premium quality materials, and proudly labeled, Made in the U.S.A., unless unforeseeable commercial constraints crop up.
It’s all happening (at the Zoo) real soon. You have our solemn pledge on it. Trust us.
Deflect & Ignore. Make America Proud Again.
A life motto to live by for all genuinely, patriotic American citizens. You know who you are.
Footnote in Fine Print
TV Cameras Split Screen Capture Tense Showdown: Trump vs. CNN
Trump also amped up his game with the super-pro version of Taunt the Press, as he did the rude thing on steroids with CNN’s network reporter. The ever vigilant TV camera wizards provided split screen coverage of this Trump milestone of bile, arrogance, supremely bad manners, and childishly eccentric pre-Presidential behavior from a supposed grownup.
This one is sort of an Insult & Ignore, tear the wings off flies, version of Trump the Petty Bully. The mike is mine own, and I won’t share. At least we have a permanent record. Trump can now rock himself to sleep with anther video classic, whenever he needs a cheap ego high.
Nanny, nanny, noo noo to you you, CNN!!!
Stately Giraffe Demonstrates Nanny Nanny Noo Noo with Tongue Effects
Here’s the animal kingdom’s tall man version of the immortal retort.***
Final Score: Giraffes 1, Trump -5
*The Emoluments Clause:
For the pickier eaters among you, actually Article I, Section 9, Clause 8, is more properly known as the “Title of Nobility” clause. But that kind of nit-picky stuff is all just legal mumbo-jumbo, and Trump’s lawyer has already just told us everything is O.K.
O.K. then. Madame Advocate, I’m sure fully satisfied.
The Title of Nobility Clause is a provision in Article I, Section 9, Clause 8 of the United States Constitution, that prohibits the Federal government from granting titles of nobility, and restricts members of the government from receiving gifts, emoluments, offices or titles from foreign states without the consent of the United States Congress. Also known as the Emoluments Clause, it was designed to shield the republican character of the United States against so–called “corrupting foreign influences”. This shield is reinforced by the corresponding prohibition on state titles of nobility in Article I, Section 10, and more generally by the Republican Guarantee Clause in Article IV, Section 4.
Here is the full text from our Founding Fathers:
No title of nobility shall be granted by the United States: and no person holding any office of profit or trust under them, shall, without the consent of the Congress, accept of any present, emolument, office, or title, of any kind whatever, from any king, prince, or foreign state.
**Original Captain America Shield from Wikipediad:
Captain America’s shield is a fictional item appearing in American comic books published by Marvel Comics. It is the primary defensive and offensive piece of equipment used by the Marvel Comics superhero Captain America; he is seldom seen without it. Over the years, Captain America has had the use of several different shields of varying composition and design. His original heater shield first appeared in Captain America Comics #1 (March 1941), published by Marvel’s 1940s predecessor, Timely Comics. The circular shield best associated with the character debuted in the next issue, Captain America Comics #2. Captain America was created by the team of writer-artist Joe Simon and artist Jack Kirby.
I apologize, in advance, to the millions of America’s true comic book fans and scholars for taking the liberty of connecting a parvenu like Trump with a genuine 75-year old American action hero. I’m sorry. But the mental leap here was just too compelling to recognize & ignore. I hope you will forgive the demotion in hero status implied by the (temporary) association. Trump is, after all, term limited, and then he reverts to his natural state.
***Well, this just seems to be the day for apologies, to man and beast. Let’s try not to make a regular habit of it.
I love giraffes, and always have, ever since I was a kid and first saw one at New York’s Bronx Zoo. For all their ungainly stature, even in unnatural captivity they are creatures of God-given grace and silky movement, mostly calm and serene rising above their dusty everyday environment. I have gone to visit them in person in Washington DC, Saint Louis, Denver, Los Angeles, San Diego, New Orleans,Louisville, Boston, Baltimore, Galveston, Cincinnati, London, Beijing, and even Baton Rouge. I have never had the privilege to see them in the wild on safari in Africa, but there is still some time left for me to make such a journey.
So, I apologize as well to these magnificent creatures, so well adapted to their surroundings, for taking the small liberty of using the evocative picture of one of their brothers (or sisters, I can’t tell right off) to poke a little fun at America’s distasteful current dilemma of too much brag and too little class. On the other hand, the photo does get right to the nub of the matter, n’est-ce pas.